For the next few weeks, I’ll be posting the best of the best so enjoy and chime in.
Dating and the Job Interview
By Shelia M. Goss
Dating these days isn’t as simple as it used to be. Even when a friend or family member introduce you to a potential mate, you have to be selective and interview them. You need to know more about them than what kind of car they drive, cell phone number and email address.
Before getting seriously involved with someone there are things you need to know before letting them into your innercircle. Have you met any of his family or friends? How do they interact? What is his religious preference? What information is he volunteering? Most men live by the motto: ”don’t ask, don’t tell,” so get your list together and the next time you’re face to face, ask. Ask, not interrogate. Be prepared however to answer the same questions honestly. It’s only fair.
If there’s any questionable things, why not invest $29.95 and do a background check. You’re probably saying if I have to go through that much trouble, why bother. Wrong. Think about it. If you were hiring an employee you would do a background check; so why not check out the guy you’re willing to bring into your world. Whether you pay $29.95 or ask probing questions to your potential mate and those who know him, check him out before making a committment. Wouldn’t it be nice to have 3 references as required when applying for a job?
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June 17th, 2008 at 2:12 pm - Edit
[…] Best of the Best - Interview Your Date By Shelia M. Goss. Dating these days isn’t as simple as it used to be. … more about them than what kind of car they drive, cell phone number […]
June 17th, 2008 at 2:41 pm - Edit
i’ve been hearing alot about this over the past couple of years.
in theory, it would answer some questions and raise just as many.
Have a great day, Shelia!
June 18th, 2008 at 12:53 am - Edit
Its crazy, but I always see dating someone knew as a multi round tournament of interviews.
First you have the preliminaries. Your not getting past call 2 if you can’t pass these. Basic “are you crazy stuff”.
Then you have about 2 rounds where I get to know you. These are done in 1-3 dates and should cover all the basic info about you and a good bit of history.
After that, we’re “dating” and you have the probationary period. Here I am looking for general reasons to cut you off.
After all that, a serious committed relationship can be discussed.
I will admit, some who fail in one round can stay “around”, but just not in that wifey role. Its like someone interviewing for CEO, but you decide they need to stay in the mail room.
June 18th, 2008 at 1:41 pm - Edit
DC, anything to open up communication. I think that’s one thing that’s lacking. People ask questions later than sooner and end up caught up.
SBM, nothing wrong with your approach. In fact, more of us need to make sure we learn more about the person before becoming involved with them on a serious level.
June 19th, 2008 at 12:49 pm - Edit
I can remember just a few years ago how it was so not PC to do a background check on someone, and you’d pretty much get clowned just for bringing it up.
But now days, you just can’t be too sure who it is on the other side of that conversation….the phone, behind the monitor and keyboard, or looking at you with that million $ smile.
It’s very important to know someone well prior to making any commitment to them, or at the very least letting them into your personal space. I also use many of the tactics that SBM uses, and I think that Shelia’s questions to ask are very fitting and necessary in times like these.
Would you buy stock without looking into the company? Elect an official to office without doing research on said individual? Purchase a house without getting it inspected? Buy a car without test driving it first/looking at the carfax report? No. (if you answered yes, then you need to take a step back and get your self/stuff together/reality check before entrapping/ruining that poor sucker that is interested in you) So then the same should apply when interviewing candidates for the potential mate vacancy.