Let It Go
People need to stop taking out what someone else did to them on other people.
From reading blog comments on other blogs it seems that a lot of people are holding on to grudges because someone of the opposite sex did them wrong. Three words of advice – LET IT GO.
Since I’m on this reflection quest as I approach another year,
I’ll use a past situation from my past for an example. I haven’t always been the calm and sweet woman I am now. I admit there are times when I might slip back into that I don’t give a f*** mode because some man I’ve encountered is showing me that he’s full of BS.
Now where was I. When my ex-boyfriend showed his a** and hurt me beyond words it took me a minute (okay more than minute) but eventually I had to let go of the anger and move on. Before I let go of the anger, I was hard on men. I allowed my built up frustrations to be taken out on unsuspecting men. If the guy didn’t do exactly what I wanted, he could hang it up. The new guy didn’t stand a chance. I eventually got over my anger and became the loving and kind woman that I am today:
- one who doesn’t settle for less than I deserve (It’s important to know your worth…another blog topic)
- one whose tolerance for B.S. is nil, but yet
- one who can appreciate a good man who has respect for women
If you live long enough you’re going to experience some things–good and bad. I don’t know one person above the age of 18 that doesn’t have baggage. It’s what you decide to do with that baggage that matters. Are you going to let it weigh you down? Are you going to put it to the side and keep on moving? Whatever a person decides to do, in order to move on and be happy with self and the opposite sex, Letting Go is a must.
I think I’ll take y’all back in time with this old school track from Teddy Pendergrass – LOVE TKO.
This is one of my favorite tracks by Keyshia Cole – LET IT GO.
Related posts:
- Will the Independent Women Please Stand Up
- Single, Committed or Married – Save the Drama
- Maturity – Is It a State of Mind?
Tagged with: Keyshia Cole • Teddy Pendergrass
Filed under: Dating • Relationships
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I talk about that in my book. You have to let the past go or else it will mess up your future.
As the song says, If It Don’t Fit, Don’t Force It, Just Relax and Let It Go”…old skool common sense!
Blessings,
angelia
Great post…and yes folks need to learn to let it go…all of it!
xoxo
That’s right, sis! It’s a lesson that’s hard for us to learn, but learn we must. I firmly believe that holding on to stuff is bad for ya health! I can’t let the poison fester. I love that Keysha Cole song! “If he ain’t gonna love you the way he should, then let it go!” That song will always be an anthem for those words alone. LOL.
Great post!
Gwyneth
You should put the video up by Erica B. Remember that song she had about Baggage?
Great blog. We do need to let go of the pain and not torture another person just because someone hurt us. At the same time, we need to make sure that we learned the lesson from that failed relationship.
I think sometimes people mistake the idea of having learned a lesson as having baggage. Supposing I was single and discovered through trial and error that I can’t have a good relationship with a man who isn’t ambitious, and I refuse to have someone similiar in my life. It’s not that I’m jaded, it’s that I’m being realistic.
If you’re walking out on relationships that isn’t working because you learned from the past that without therapy people don’t change, then that’s being honest and taking care of yourself.
I personally think the past is very instructional. But as Ekhart Tolle says, use clock time, not emotional time. Apply the lessons learned yesterday today. That’s what they are there for. That’s how scientists work. They build on information gleaned from yesterday…
JMHO anyway….
Great blog Shelia….that’s why I’m single now…..I learned from my mistakes and I will not settle for anything less!!!!
“Whatever I like I put it on my radio”
http://www.myspace.com/musiqssoulcafe
PrincessDominique – folks need to get your book. It’s some good advice in there.
Angelia – unfortunately sometimes common sense goes out the window when feelings are involved.
Yasmin – exactly.
Gwyneth – letting go also mean forgiving. Although hard, it’s something that must be done or it will kill you. P.S. – that Keyshia Cole song says a lot.
Claudia – that’s a good choice too. I forgot the Erkyah Badu song.
Leah – definately learn your lessons from past relationships, but holding a grudge because someone did you wrong isn’t healthy. Baggage and lessons are two different things. People who carry around hurt, pain, guilt, etc that’s baggage. When you’re not willing to “let go” of those things, they can weigh you down. Ignoring them won’t go away. Sometimes you have to face it head-on; deal with it and then let it go and move on. Life doesn’t stop because of one failed relationship. There’s life afterwards–so folks shouldn’t allow it to rule their world—let it go.
Meachy – don’t settle for less than what you feel you deserve.
Great post! A friend of mine and I were talking about this very subject not to long ago. While you may let go, you also have to forgive and a lot of times the hardest person to forgive is yourself. You forgive the other person, but you forget to forgive yourself.
Yes, you are right!
LET.
IT.
GO.
right now.