How Soon is Too Soon
Thursday, March 12th, 2009 at
12:29 am
Dating and relationships can be so complicated. When do you know it’s time to go from “just dating” to a committed relationship?
Is it when:
- you’re spending more time together than apart
- time flies by when you’re with them
- you find you have a lot in common and you actually like them
- you realize this is someone you want to know better
- you both realize that you don’t want to date anyone else
Should there be a time line from dating to relationship–should you date for months before deciding he or she is someone you want to see exclusively? How soon is too soon?
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Filed under: Dating • Relationships
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Not sure how to answer this question since I find out too soon they are not the one for me to be with at all. I will wait to see what God has for me in the near future. I hope soon can be within weeks to 3 months to know it is time to be exclusively in love and lead to marriage! We shall see.
Thanks Shelia Goss for sharing.
I don’t think it’s good to have a hard-and-fast rule about something related to how soon should you go from going out here and there to being in a committed relationship. It’s important to ascertain the character of a person, so however long that takes… I think it depends on the people and on the relationship. When my husband and I met, we were connected pretty much instantly. But that may not work for all people.
Some people hop into relationships too soon, while others never quite make it to the point of being an item. I think you must first know what you want and are interested in, and also who you are. Then you can figure out if a certain relationship is for you.
I am not sure there is a true way to deal with this answer. I think that the daqting game had changed alot since I dated. I usually had exclusive relationships after a few weeks of dating. I think that these days the men have the upper hand and some of them take advantage of that and play the field aklot more than women would like. Not willing to commit as soon as the woman is.
I agree with the general consensus here, that its kinda of a heart line over a time line… ya know. When the motor starts turning over sometimes you just have to jump in and take that ride.
I’m a chemical girl so I usually go with my internal clock and so far it’s been working for me… I know when to hold up and when to fold up based on an internal indicator.
Love… sets its own pace, you’re just come alone for the company (haha).
I said this the other day to someone, and I think it holds true here as well: it would be nice if people were forced to hold their emotions in check for the first six months of “courting” or “dating” someone.
That way, you get a chance to actually know someone and/or figure out if that person is crazy or not. Then again, there are too many people who are driven crazy by their emotions.
Either way, I think people should wait a few months before defining what they have as exclusive even if that’s what it is — and it should be. I think dating more than one person at a time is unhealthy and leads to confusion/cheating/adultery/whoredom/bad life habits.
“I will wait to see what God has for me in the near future.”
Adrienna – that’s the best route to go.
“I think you must first know what you want and are interested in, and also who you are. Then you can figure out if a certain relationship is for you.”
Monica – thanks. I too think it depends on the two people.
LaShonda – When I realize a man is playing those type of games, I remove myself from the equation.
“Love… sets its own pace, you’re just come alone for the company ”
“I think dating more than one person at a time is unhealthy and leads to confusion/cheating/adultery/whoredom/bad life habits.”
Thismayconcernyou – and the list could go on and on. I prefer being in a committed relationship than just kicking it with someone. I like to know him and I are exclusive–now if he does do some of those things you mentioned, then I know he’s not the man for me and I move on.