Happy 4th of July! and check out the July Newsletter by clicking here.

Besides writing books, I love music and movies. My movie reviewing venture is taken off and I wanted to share the new site with you all: www.filmreviews2go.com. Please be sure to bookmark it and leave your comments on the movies you’ve seen; whether you agree or disagree with the reviews. All feedback is welcome.

 To read the highlights of the 2008 BET Awards show, go to my entertainment page by CLICKING HERE.

The internet has become the new way to meet people; whether looking for a casual or long-term relationship. Although dating is dating, virtual dating adds an extra element. There are pros and cons to virtual dating.

Pro - You get to learn a few things about the person before meeting them in person.
Con - The person on the other end of the computer may not be who they say they are.

Pro - Both parties are given a chance to be attracted to the inner beauty and not be blindsided by the person’s physical attributes.
Con - A picture or description can be fabricated and what you see when you actually meet might not be who you envisioned.

Pro - You don’t have to leave the comfort of your home.
Con - It can be anti-social and you won’t be able to see how the other person acts in a social setting.

Overall when it comes to virtual dating safety is important. Although you may chat, instant message, etc. on a daily basis, in reality you still don’t know the person. If you decide to meet in person, someone close to you should have all of the other person’s information just in case something happens. I would even suggest that not only do you meet in a public place but take a friend along with you (even if the friend sits at another table).

Beware, the person on the other end of the computer screen can be whoever they want to be while hiding behind a screen name.

Virtual dating doesn’t always mean real! Virtual dating can be fun, but it can’t replace face to face interaction.

Paula Chase-Hyman is the author of the Del Rio Bay Clique Novels. Whether you’re a teenager or an adult, you’ll find the novels in the series entertaining.

7 Random Thoughts with Paula Chase-Hyman

What’s one thing (besides writing) that you enjoy doing?

I love being active.  Writing is a quiet, solitary, sedentary thing.  So when I’m not doing that, I enjoy being outside.  I’m a total nature chick, so I love parks and bike trails.  Best of all, being outside working out or being outside lying on a blanket looking up into the sky are both great for kick starting ideas.

What’s your favorite quote?

“The only constant in life is change.”  I have no idea who may have said it originally, but my dad used to say it to me all the time when I was a teenager.  It was his way of helping me learn that change is forever.  And to this day, I take that to heart.  It’s why, no matter what, I roll with the punches and adjust as things change around me.

What television show best describes your life and why?

Hmmm…I know what television title describes my life: Mi Vida Loco!  “My Crazy Life” because my life is very full and often crazy.  A typical work load for me is working my full-time job, juggling writing and promotional responsibility for my series, coaching a competitive cheer squad and being a wife and mom on top of all that.  I’m a multi-tasker times ten.  But honestly, Seinfeld is a good pick too because it reinforces how life is simply a series of quirky everyday happenings.  I know my life is.

What is your most valued possession?

My health.  I was in a terrible car accident a month ago and was bedridden for a few weeks.  It was the worst feeling in the world.  Although things could have been much worse, I had a lot of time to lament the loss of independence.  Now I’m still dealing with recovery, as my knee was injured.  And for someone as mobile and active as me, not being able to do for myself and get around on my own terms is as close to hell as I ever want to get.

What would your best friend say about you?

That I’m crazy.  But good-crazy.  I’m the sarcastic-witted friend in the bunch.  The one always dropping observational one-liners.

What does love mean to you?

Love means supporting someone unconditionally.  I’m not saying turning a blind eye to wrong-doing or constantly forgiving someone when they take advantage of you.  I mean, even when you’re angry, annoyed, frustrated or just plain sick of someone, you’re still able to stand by them and give them what they need.

What is your favorite outfit to wear and why?

I’ll probably have to retire these this year, but I have a pair of brown cords that I purchased in the junior department of a store about three years ago.  I’ve always been so proud that I can fit them, so I love wearing them.  They’re skinny at the top and slightly flared at the leg, so it makes me look a little taller – always a good thing since I’m a shortie.

Bonus: Tell me about your teen series and what can readers expect from you in 2008.

My Del Rio Bay series has really taken off.  It’s YA that speaks to suburban teens.  I focused on suburban teens because African American ‘burb teens are often left out of mainstream books.  Or they’re the token, side friend. And honestly, books that revolve around African American teens tend to focus on either historical situations or inner city scenarios.  But what about the teens who deal daily with the duality of living in a suburb where they’re one of only a few black faces in their school or neighborhood?  I grew up in a predominately African American suburb, but my school was predominately white – so I’ve always lived the duality of my neighborhood’s culture vs. the school’s overall culture. I wanted to portray that side of life in fiction.

The third book in the series, That’s What’s Up! will be released July 1^st and I feel like this is the make or break book for the series, because a reader could have picked up the first OR second in the series and been up to speed.  But you can’t read That’s What’s Up! without reading So Not the Drama or Don’t get It Twisted.  This third book signals you’re an honest to God fan of the series – so I’m excited about that.  It anchors the series because now readers need to be familiar with the characters and those who are will understand the characters actions, will understand the growth the characters are experiencing.

This series is truly like my baby, right now.  I’ve taken a group of friends, started them as freshman and hope to get them to graduation.  Even though I’m their puppet master, it’s still fascinating to watch them grow.  And while some people probably expected each book to be about popularity, the series is organic.  I’m having the characters deal with real issues.  The first was about transitioning friendships from middle school to high school.  The second was about crushes and boyfriends.  This third is about forbidden relationships and frenemies.  So they’re dealing with issues that many teens face. 

By year’s end, the fourth book in the series, Who You Wit’? will be out.  The characters are in their sophomore year by then and the book deals with first times vs. abstaining from sex.  So in 2008 readers will watch Mina and the clique mature before their eyes.  What I love about it is, it’s not a from zero to sixty growth in maturity, but a very real step-by-step journey.  I hope readers enjoy going on the journey with the characters as much as I do when I’m writing about it.

Be sure to promote summer reading with your teens. Be sure to pick up Paula Chase-Hyman’s latest book. To learn more about her or her books, visit www.paulachasehyman.com

Thanks Kem for the joke - “Modern who’s on first…”

 If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch,
“Who’s on First?” might have turned out something like this:

ABBOTT: Super Duper Computer Store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I’m setting up an office in my den and I’m thinking
about buying a computer.

ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the name’s Lou.

ABBOTT: Your computer?
COSTELLO: I don’t own a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name’s Lou.

ABBOTT: What about Windows?
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO: I don’t know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for Windows?
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write
proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just did.
COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOTT: Recommend something.
COSTELLO: You recommended something?

ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: For my office?

ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.
COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let’s just say I’m
sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal, what do I need?

ABBOTT: Word.
COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT: Word in Office.
COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTE LLO: Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue “W”.
COSTELLO: I’m going to click your blue “w” if you don’t start with some
straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I
can track my money with?

ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: That’s right. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.
COSTELLO: What’s bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One copy.
COSTELLO: Isn’t it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

A few days later:

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on “START

Meet Parris Mitchell - The R & B Diva

R & B Diva Parris Mitchell says “Don’t call it a comeback. I haven’t gone anywhere, just needed to take some time off.”

The R & B Diva multi-award winning singer Parris Mitchell is back on the music scene after taking a little time away from the limelight to regroup. Her previous albums have hit every chart and she’s had several number one singles.

Her personal life has been filled with turmoil lately with the news of her ex-boyfriend and ex-manager Archie Walker running out with not only her money but her assistant. How does one make a comeback? I recently had a chance to interview Parris and she discusses the fiasco as well as her music.

Shelia Goss: Parris, it’s good to see you making a comeback. We’ve missed not hearing any music from you.
Parris Mitchell: Don’t call it a comeback. I haven’t gone anywhere. I just needed to take some time off.

Shelia: So what happened with Archie Walker? There was a time where I couldn’t open up a magazine or newspaper without seeing you two together. I was shocked to read the news about your breakup.
Parris: Imagine how I felt. I think we all learned about the breakup at the same time—in the newspaper.

Shelia: Now that was low down.
Parris: Well that’s Archie for you. I found out he was leaving me while reading an article in the paper. To top it off, he ran away with my assistant Sylvia.

Shelia: I know that must have been hard.
Parris: It was. He left me emotionally depleted. And as most know, he was also my manager. The business side of my career went a little haywire too. But all is well now.

Shelia: I want to thank you for granting me this exclusive interview. I know you were shying away from reporters so I’m honored.
Parris: I felt it was time to squash the rumors. Yes, Archie did take some of my money—lots of it. But he didn’t leave me broke like some of the tabloids and online gossip sites have been saying.

Shelia: Were you able to recoup any of your money?
Parris: Ha. Ha. If I ever catch up with the joker, I might be able to.

Shelia: You have a great attitude.
Parris: I can’t wallow around in self-pity for too long. Things happen. You deal with it and then you dust yourself off and get back in the game of life.

Shelia: Did your record company give you an ultimatum or was that a rumor too?
Parris: There’s a little truth in it. I love to sing and will sing for free; however this is my career and a record company is in it to make money. I’m a little disappointed that my last few albums didn’t take off like I thought they would.

Shelia: When can fans expect to hear some new music from you?
Parris: Right now, I’m trying to find the right producers. I’ve been doing a little writing. I’m getting back to the core of who Parris is. My goal is to give fans what they’ve been looking for.

Shelia: I heard it through the grapevine that you would be working with CJ the Hitmaker.

Parris: Right now, I’m not at liberty to say who I will be working with. I’ve been looking at him and Lance and a few others.

Shelia: You’ve been around for about ten years now. Do you think you can compete with the new class of R & B singers?
Parris: I hope no one takes my response the wrong way, but there’s no competition. We each do what we do. When some of the new ladies break out on the scene and try to imitate me, I look at it as a compliment. I don’t feel intimidated by it. I am Parris.

DOUBLE PLATINUM in stores March 4, 2008 or order your copy now from AMAZON.COM.

5 Tips to Finding Your Soul Mate

 by Guest Blogger Linda Dominique Grosvenor

We’d all like to bypass the hurt and pain of choosing the wrong mate. If we could avoid the men and women who aren’t a match for us and engage someone who will celebrate us and appreciate what we bring to the table instead of someone who comes into our lives just to take whatever they can get, we would. Let me first clear up the thought that there is a simple formula to finding your soul mate—there isn’t. On the bright side, there are steps we can take that will not only prepare us mentally, emotionally and spiritually for the right relationship, but teach us how to “tune in” so we don’t miss it when the right one comes along.

Stop Looking. So many of us spend endless hours looking across the room or scanning a crowded party trying to make eye contact because we feel that it’s the only way we’ll ever find someone interesting. We spend so much time looking outward when really the search to finding someone who will compliment us starts inward. What do you want to do in life? Are you meeting your own goals? So many people are miserable when they couple up because they spent so much time seeking someone else and little or no time fleshing out their own hopes and dreams. Make yourself the focus first. That’s what being single is about. Once you get a handle on you, your likes and dislikes and what you want to do in life, it is far less likely that you will couple up with someone who doesn’t mirror the things you desire. Knowing your own purpose is the best way to be able to eliminate the counterfeits when they approach you.

Appreciate People Just As They Are. This is hard for some people because the media has us brainwashed into seeking perfection in everybody we meet. We want a Denzel face, Angelina lips, Janet Jackson body and a Bill Gates wallet, but we should appreciate everybody we meet even if we don’t consider them a potential mate. These same people can end up being potential business contacts, lifelong friends or so much more. But when we become totally enamored with the outer appearance, the car someone drives, the kind of job they have or other material things rather than bypassing those things and having a heart to heart with them, it actually speaks more of our own inadequacies than theirs. We want someone who has these things because deep down we don’t believe we’re enough. So, get those airbrushed men and women out of your minds. Real men and women don’t look like Hollywood stars in magazines anyway. The package that you’re demanding your perfect mate fit into may come with a rotten personality or abusive behavior. Broaden your mind so that you’re getting the total package of love—not just an empty shell.

Be Approachable. This goes with “appreciating people” part, but delves even deeper than that. If the perfect man or woman walked up on some of us today they would have to turn around and leave without the love they came for because too many of us aren’t approachable. We’ve been hurt and betrayed before and it shows on our face and in our body language because we are wounded and haven’t healed. We twist up our lips, we give them the death stare, we huff and puff and our answers are short and clipped as if we’d rather be wrestling alligators than having an interesting conversation with a potential someone. Who wants to get to know anybody who acts like that? We’ve all encountered hurt, but it’s unfair to make someone who may be interested in us go hacking through our walls and protective outer shell before they can even get close enough for a hello. This friendly stranger hasn’t wronged you. If you’re going to engage someone at least be decent enough to give them the clean slate that you’d expect them to give you upon first meeting. Put your armor down. Trust me, being pleasant and being cordial to people you meet doesn’t mean you’re gullible or being a push over. It simply makes you more pleasant to be around and it means that you’ve healed enough from your past to be out there safely dating again without hurting anybody.

Listen to That Still Small Voice. We all come equipped with a sense of intuition, we just have to tap into it. Sometimes we know right out of the gate that the person we are interested in is no good for us. But a lot of times we allow loneliness, the thrill of the chase, the pretty package they come in or the fact that we’re home on a Friday night to con us into being with someone we wouldn’t normally engage. Substitutes are great for people who want to spend their entire relationship acting like they’re totally into someone they could care less about. Fortunately though, the best way to find “the person” for you is to “wait” and stop accepting substitutes. If the soul mate comes while you’re engaging a counterfeit or substitute they’re likely to do an about face and you’ll miss your chance. Don’t allow your impatience to make you miss out on the experience of the real thing. When you meet that special person that still small voice will let you know, and they’ll definitely be more satisfying than someone you just took up with to warm a spot on your sofa in front of the DVD player.

Read The Plural Thing: Spiritually Preparing for Your Soul Mate. This isn’t a sales pitch. The whole reason why even in my own personal reading time I’ve gravitated more towards reading non-fiction is because people everywhere are governing their lives like characters in novels and on their favorite television shows and have forgotten how to initiate lasting and fulfilling relationships. The book uses real life experiences of women who have had issues in relationships and uses spiritual advice to help the reader get their lives back on track, where love and understanding God’s design for marriage and relationships is concerned.

Remember love doesn’t need a map to find you. You only need be receptive to it. 

  Linda Dominique Grosvenor has made her foray into non-fiction with the inspirational smash hit The Plural Thing: Spiritually Preparing for Your Soul Mate. Her expertise on dating and relationship issues has been used in articles for publications such as Modern Bride, Jolie, Jewel, Honey and MORE Magazine. For a chance to win one of seven (7) free copies of The Plural Thing: Spiritually Preparing for Your Soul Mate in the February, 2008 giveaway join her mailing list by sending a blank email to princessdominiqueunplugged-subscribe@yahoogroups.com before February 28, 2008. Log on to her official website at www.LindaDominiqueGrosvenor.com for details on how to request a free excerpt of The Plural Thing.

For the next few weeks, I’ll be posting the best of the best so enjoy and chime in. 

Dating and the Job Interview

By Shelia M. Goss

Dating these days isn’t as simple as it used to be. Even when a friend or family member introduce you to a potential mate, you have to be selective and interview them. You  need to know more about them than what kind of car they drive, cell phone number and email address.

Before getting seriously involved with someone there are things you need to know before letting them into your innercircle. Have you met any of his family or friends? How do they interact? What is his religious preference? What information is he volunteering? Most men live by the motto: ”don’t ask, don’t tell,” so get your list together and the next time you’re face to face, ask. Ask, not interrogate. Be prepared however to answer the same questions honestly. It’s only fair.

If there’s any questionable things, why not invest $29.95 and do a background check. You’re probably saying if I have to go through that much trouble, why bother. Wrong. Think about it. If you were hiring an employee you would do a background check; so why not check out the guy you’re willing to bring into your world.  Whether you pay $29.95 or ask probing questions to your potential mate and those who know him, check him out before making a committment. Wouldn’t it be nice to have 3 references as required when applying for a job?

This will be the first Father’s Day that I have no one to celebrate the day for. I dedicate these songs in the memory of my dad, Lloyd Goss (1996) and grandfather, JC Hogan (2007):

Dance with My Father Again - Luther Vandross

It’s So Hard To Say Goodbye To Yesterday - Boyz II Men

Bye Bye - Mariah Carey

Amazing Grace - Mahalia Jackson