The internet has become the new way to meet people; whether looking for a casual or long-term relationship. Although dating is dating, virtual dating adds an extra element. There are pros and cons to virtual dating. Pro – You get to learn a few…
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I’m excited to announce that I am the new Dallas Romance writer on the website Examiner.com. I need your help to be a success at it. On the days I’ll be writing over there, I’ll post a snippet here to alert you to that day’s topic and you can just click on the link.
If you’re not subscribed to my personal mailing list, there is an option on Examiner.com where you can subscribe directly there for updates.
Check out the article I posted today: Six ways to add the spark back into your relationship
Leave your comments there or here. What other tips would you add?
I came across this article on Cosmopolitan.com:
Single women everywhere are wondering where are the single men. As Comeback Girl said on her blog, they aren’t under your couch. So what is a single woman to do? Well, I have a few tips, I like to call the 5 B’s:
#2 on the list – Be Friendly. Nothing says “I’m approachable” like a big ol’ beautiful smile. If you’re in the store and pass by a man you find attractive, it doesn’t hurt to speak first. Don’t walk around frowning. Nobody wants to be around a sourpuss. A friendly gesture might be all it takes for your prince charming to give you a second look.
To read my entire list, read my previous blog post: You Don’t Have to Be Beyonce to Date a Jay Z
Where are the single men? In addition to The Comeback Girls 50 Places List, I would like to add you can find single men at:
If you were to advise your single friends, where are other places they can meet other singles?
Cougars, women that date younger men, are the buzz right about now. Everyone’s talking about older women who have younger men as their mates, boy toys or arm accessories.
A topic that was once taboo has hit the main stream thanks to Demi Moore, Madonna, Terri McMillian and her book/movie “How Stella Got her Groove Back”, and others. May/December romances have been long accepted when it comes to the male gender, and in some cases it was considered a rite of passage for a man to enter his 40’s buy a Corvette and get a girlfriend half his age, it earned him a badge of honor. But that same behavior was considered taboo if done by a woman. The female counterpart acting in the same manner was branded as desperate and chasing jail bate.
While not condoning or condemning such relationships on the part of either gender, I think it is important for women to recognize “Why” some men are attracted to Cougars. In the same manner that we should analyze other events in our lives, we should analyze this situation and extract the positive benefits from it as well and marinate on them. There is something to be learned from everything we witness or see. Before we judge these relationships and the parties to them, let’s dissect the positive energy behind the relationship. Instead of looking at what makes a woman find comfort in a younger man, why not examine what makes a younger man chase and become enchanted by an older woman, and then use those attractions to better ourselves no matter what our walk in life may be.
Younger men often chase older women because they find Cougars to be confident, established, free from drama and sexy because they know what they want in life. Those are qualities ALL women should aspire to acquire; age irrelevant. Women need to OWN their existence and control their own domain. Being self aware and self-sufficient is sexy…it is attractive. What a Cougar’s prey loves about his predator is the aura surrounding her that she knows who she is and how she walks, as if on air, in the reality that she has invented for herself. He finds her enticing because how can he but love her when she first loves herself? He feels her love the love she has for herself and desires to part of the ménage a tois of the personal love affair she has within herself. To him she is enticing because she loves herself and is comfortable in her own skin without complaining of outer flaws to the magnificent creation of God that she is. She does not compare herself to others. She could care less about where she ranks in regard to other women, for she loves herself and that is all that matters. As he looks at the Cougar that will eventually devour him, he willingly lets himself be absorbed by her because her presence is a drama-free utopia of comfort to him. There is no silliness, or foolishness embedded in a Cougar because she has more important and productive things to do than worrying about the actions and opinions of others; and that mindset of hers propels her aged body to a more seductive place than her single-minded, yet young Coke-bottled shaped counterpart can achieve.
Being a Cougar might not be the answer for all women, but it might not be a bad idea to adopt some of her qualities and as such to every once in a while Aspire and Acquire qualities that are COUGARISH….
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Lorraine Elzia is the Author of Mistress Memoirs. She is a 2009 African American Literary Award nominee for “Break-Out” Author of the year and has been featured in several anthologies including two Chicken Soup for the Soul Anthologies and The Triumph of My Soul Anthology. Lorraine is Co-Owner of Eve’s Literary Services, contributing Editor of the “Gumbo for the Soul” series; and Co-Moderator of Essentially Women, a writing group for African American women. She is from Austin, Texas, by way of Motown (Detroit, Michigan) and it is her desire that through the written word delivered in different genres, she will be able to inspire and motivate others to see the beauty that resides within all people. www.lorraineelzia.com;www.peaceinthestormpublishing.com.
Why do we believe his lie?
Hi I am VeeVeca Lavoira, Author and Evangelist. But mostly– I am a lot of woman. Today, I have a question. What makes us believe his lie? Do we feel sorry for the mishaps of a man’s misfortune so much so that we let little things slide. Like him not showing up on time? Not paying for the meal? Or, he forgot that he was supposed to do a thing. Seemingly excusing bad behavior for the “I meant to” or the “If I could I would” lines. What’s up with that?
Do we coddle the man to keep him? Look over the obvious and figure, one day (whenever that is) he’ll get it right (or we die hoping change comes). Or do we let him go, to break him, make him, or be made ourselves? Why do women feel responsible her man’s well-being? I’m just saying, He that finds a wife finds a good thing? I didn’t write the story, I’m just sharing the… What Is Written.
As a woman, are we that hard up for a man that we accept less effort just to have a bag of bones to say “I gotta my man”? Is it that good to have nothing that you have to work hard to f a t t e n up just to keep him? Is it a sense of duty to save him or you?
In this hip hop nation, I heard it just like you’ve heard it. “I’m down for my man” Or better yet, “Yeah, I am a ride or die chick”. Young ladies say it everyday as if they are positioned to “man up”. But if you are manning up, what is he doing?
If you want more, be and expect more.
No matter the climb or struggle within, trust God with every heavy situation and circumstance. He is still the God of catching cares. His glove is never frayed or broken.
Stay encouraged in the heavy– and move Forward
Real Ministry: VeeVeca
VeeVeca Lavoira,Author www.Verbalconquest.net 
“Faith does not deny FACTS, it CHANGES them“
Song of the Day – Text Messages by Raheem Devaughn
Here’s a post I wrote last year about texting.
To Text or Not?
Why do guys you just meet feel that its okay to send a text message before picking up the phone to call? I’m all high tech and in fact will be getting my new phone today that has word, excel and powerpoint on it, but I’m old school when it comes to dating. Dudes pick up the phone and call a woman unless she lets you know that texting is okay.
1. Let your first communication be with a phone call.
2. Sending a quick text during the course of the day because you’re at work to say you were thinking about them, enjoyed your date–okay; but setting up a first date via text is not okay.
3. If you’re at home, why are you texting? Pick up the phone. Call the person. Are you hiding something and that’s why you can’t talk?
Don’t get me wrong. I don’t have a problem with texting but I don’t like for it to be the main form of communication.
How do you feel about texting?
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